Excerpt from Psalm 51
“Have mercy on me, God, in your kindness.
In your compassion blot out my offense....
Indeed you love truth in the heart;
then in the secret of my heart teach me wisdom.
O purify me, then I shall be clean;
O wash me, I shall be whiter than snow.
A pure heart create for me, O God,
put a steadfast spirit within me....
O Lord, open my lips
and my mouth shall declare your praise.
For in sacrifice you take no delight,
burnt offering from me you would refuse,
my sacrifice, a contrite spirit.
A humbled, contrite heart you will not spurn.”
These lines from Psalm 51---which are in the psalter for Week III, Friday morning prayer---touched me as I prayed them. I especially resonate with these lines, “you love truth in the heart” and “A pure heart create for me, O God.”
As I seek God through prayer and meditation, I want to become more pure of heart, so that I can truly see God. I want to feel a one-to-one, direct communion with God. If my heart is divided in any way, if I feel a pull toward my own self-will, then my motives are mixed; I have not completely surrendered, and I am not completely available for God. I want to give God all of myself, so I can see God, face-to-face, without any impediment.
Complete surrender is so hard. I must die to myself and feel the pain of loss, but this move toward emptiness will allow God to enter in and allow this direct communion with God.
